Frequency: The Forgotten Side of Feedback

When it comes to feedback, people often talk about how to ask for it and how to give it, but less consideration is often given to developing the skill of actually receiving feedback. That’s a shame since no matter how skilled you are at asking for feedback, if you don’t know how to receive it, you’re only seeing half the picture.

Kerry J. Sulkowicz recently wrote in the BusinessWeek blog:

“It may seem counterintuitive, but one of the best ways to ease the sting of criticism is to ask for it on a regular basis. Think of it as preemptive action — a strategy that will help you learn, in doses you can handle, how you are experienced by others. It’s a healthy way to gain a sense of control over being critiqued.”

The concept is simple but powerful: in order to develop the skill of receiving feedback you have to ask for it on a regular basis.

It’s very hard to pick up any skill and get it right the first time. Feedback is no different than doing anything you’re not used to.  Like learning a new language or sport, you need to take small steps and do it often.

Working at Rypple has changed the way I feel about feedback.   The first Rypple I sent was nerve racking.  I felt like I was putting my ego on the line.  I was worried that I would be judged by the super-smart people I work with.   I was not used to this experience.

But like anything new… the first time wasn’t as hard as I feared.  I got helpful tips and felt confident to ask again…and again., and again.! Now, having sent out many Rypples, I truly appreciate the learning process and the fact that being on the receiving end of Rypple feedback actually helps me and my team get better.

The secret to making this easy was practice through doing.